This is a reply to Ben (Forcatladies.tumblr.com) who had made a text post on sex, relationships, and their different combinations. You can see the original post here: http://forcatladies.tumblr.com/post/17947336764/on-definitions-of-sex
I must note as a prerequisite that every opinion in this post is mine and mine alone. You may feel as though some points I make may be judgemental. If so, that’s your interpretation of what I’ve said and I highly encourage discussion on controversial topics where it is not regards to my opinion.
Ben, I see your first statement where the post actually “begins” with regards to the topic is “I have never had casual sex and I don’t plan to” yet you continue on to an exception of “right atmosphere, the right level of intoxication and the right man” which, personally, seems a very contradicting and fickle way to start a statement about love and relationships. Just sayin’.
But that’s not what I’m here for. I’m not here to change your opinion or alter the way you think about love and relationships because that’s your opinion, and this is mine:
Previously mentioned is that under the influence of alcohol it is possible for you to have casual sex and I find that, although untrue in many cases, alcohol is a “harbinger of truth” and “brings out the truth in people”. That’s just some food for thought though.
Although lacking in personal experience, I’ve (somehow) accumulated a theory in that in the act of sex people attempt to make a connection (or “shared experience” as you say). I feel as though you’ve clean-cut and segmented two different types of sexual encounters without taking into account the grey area between the two.
I digress, to each scenario there is a different “kind of sex” and trying to categorise them is as fruitless as trying to categorise sexuality (which is currently in execution with society today).
Furthermore, I just want to state that in many cases from secondary sources (friends) that bonds and relationships that you mention in the “second kind of sex” can be made (un)intentionally from the “first kind of sex”. I find this intriguing as, yet again; this complicates things as it is, yet again, not one or the other and not even a spectrum but a spectrum that is constantly changing.
You carry on to random scenarios of heterosexual couples (which is, by the way, irrelevant as love & relationships know no sexuality). I feel as though everyone nowadays is indoctrinated in a sense that they need to find “true love”/life partners as soon as possible as the unconditional love films usurp the media in every possible sense and as films such as “40 Year Old Virgin” circulate the comedy section too. People don’t want to be alone and are taught to want to find somebody from a very young age. As I make this statement I see ridiculous (yet true) examples pop into my head.
The fact that they get together and move along so quickly is that they take chances. They take chances in that they want to create the ‘true love’ connection from sex.
An attempt to understand their thought process is as follows;
“Fine, my previous partner wasn’t the one for me and we broke up, but I best keep trying before I die alone.”
Try to see my point as to why people circulate so easily, especially in people’s teen years when they are so impressionable from media and other sources.
I conclude my opinion as follows: sex can be a creator of a connection or it can strengthen a connection, the frequency of someone’s (anyone’s) partners is due to society, and sex cannot be categorised for the endless scenarios and situations that could occur.
However I’m like 12 years old and have never had sex. Loltxtit you basically just read a load of bullshit. xo Gossip Drew